To My Dude.

 

To my favorite dude.
My rock, my priesthood holder, my love & my very best friend.

You left town this week and I sobbed as you packed your bags. You said something funny about how I used to love it when we were first married and you would go back to Vernal for 2 weeks for work. One week with you here, and two weeks with you being in Vernal leaving me in an apartment all to myself. An apartment that, for two whole weeks, didn't have laundry on the floor or in the window sill of our bedroom. Your bathroom door opened all the way because there weren't clothes behind it, and the remote controls stayed exactly where I left them. There weren't empty otter pop or go-gurt wrappers on the coffee table and the scissors stayed in the kitchen drawer.

As I curled up in the guest bed last night wiping my sick-with-a-cold snotty nose and swollen crying eyes I realized something. That this miss-independent, I-can-do-it-myself girl you've known for so many years, really has come to rely on you for so many things. I'm sure it happened long ago, but after 2 years and 4 months of being married, you really are my better-half.

I was once told that you can't fully love someone else until you learn to love yourself first. I think that's true.. but I also think that I've learned to love myself, and be patient with myself because you see the good in me. You tell me you love me and when I look in the mirror I see what you see. Maybe I'm not so great at being wonderful all the time. I've been onry, I've been so stubborn, I've been a complete pain in the ass. But ultimately you've made me better. You put into perspective the things that really matter and I've realized it's better to be loving than distant. It's better to forgive quickly than hold grudges, and hugging always fixes things.

You've become so much more than husband. You've taken on the role of care taker, confidant, foot massager and baby belly holder. You've taken birthing classes with me even when I know you didn't want to. You've cooked me dinner, you get snow cones with me, you've stood up for me, and no matter what you always take my side. You even let me pick paint colors that I loved, even though you hated them. AND you told me the colors looked good, even though I know you thought otherwise. You've loved my family and taken care of papa {which is a hard task} You've laughed at his ridiculous jokes & you've made stupid jokes yourself. That occasionally get me to laugh really hard.

Sometimes I catch you looking at me during movies because you like to watch my reactions. You hug me when I'm angry & tell me I'm pretty after I take my makeup off. Even if some of it is still smeared around my eyes. You tell me I look beautiful when I'm all ready for church even though my dress doesn't quite fit anymore and I tried on 6 different outfits. Just when I'm trying so hard to be strong, whether it's for me or you, or just the mere fact that I'm trying to keep sane, you tell me just in the nick of time that everything is going to be okay.
And I believe you.

I knew you were someone special from day 1. Thank you for being so patient and understanding with me, and loving me even with I least deserve it. I couldn't have asked for a better husband. You have truly become my best friend and my best partner in crime.
 
You're a total goofball and I'm so thankful for that. I really do swoon over you making up your own words to songs even though I want to correct you. {And I do correct you most of the time.} I loved it when you told me you wanted juggling balls and a hair dryer for Father's Day, and how you make fun of the way I say "baby carrots". I love it when you ask me if your hair looks okay and when I tell you something in your wardrobe doesn't match and you say, "yes it does." I hate that you call Jax "Jack" and peanut "peanuts" because you only do it to bug me. But yet I still laugh out loud every. time.

I love that we've created our own life together. We've moved into an apartment, bought Winston and our fish, decided to have a family together, bought a home....
I love that we've done these things together. You were supportive of me when I was in school and I try to do the same for you. We love different things and have so much to offer each other. I love dreaming of our life together and imagining how things will be next year, or in 5 years, or 10 years.. and I love knowing you'll be by my side the whole time.  

I have come to realize that I rely on you for so much more than I would like to admit. But I think that's a good thing. I've realized that I'd rather have your clothes strung throughout the house and the remote controls in between the couch cushions than have an apartment all to myself. I'm okay picking up otter pop wrappers and putting the scissors back in the drawer over and over if it means you're sitting on the couch by me.
{don't think this is me giving you permission btw.. you can still pick up your own clothes & otter pop wrappers..}

I'm so happy to have you forever
and Baby Mack is going to be one lucky kid to have you as his dad.

I love you so much.
-TT

San Francisco Lovin'

As I mentioned earlier this week we spent the weekend in San Francisco for our Anniversary! We thought this would be a great opportunity to celebrate together + have a last little get away before Baby Boy gets here and life gets even more busy.

We flew out of the Provo, Utah airport which was seriously amusing. It was so small it was almost terrifying so dainty and cute! Our flight was delayed a bit, but that meant I had time to squeeze in another lunch before take off. Yes.

When we arrived in Oakland and got a cab to San Francisco my heart was already melting. I had been there a matter of minutes and was already in love with the Bay Area. It was sunny, the city looked amazing, there were sailboats everywhere, and the smell of salt water made my heart race. I must have sent an adrenaline rush to Baby because he was kicking around like crazy.

We got to our hotel which shocked us both when we realized how close it was to everything. We were in the heart of Fisherman's Wharf and I couldn't wait to explore! Walking along the piers I was again so thankful this pregnancy has been so good to me. I would have been barfing up a storm if smells were bugging me. Fresh fish, smoke, salt water, cooking food...

We went to Pier 39 for dinner and I had officially 100% fallen in love with San Francisco at this point. Little shops everywhere, water crashing against the pier, a massive merry-go-round, so many places to eat, treats everywhere, street performers, walking around with Spencer..
 I was so happy.

{..I was even happier when we found the mini donut stand.
We got 12 to share, and may or may not have eaten 12. By myself.}

The Next morning we walked along Fisherman's Wharf & went to Alcatraz.

 

Lookin' snazzy in our audio guide gear. Standing in Maximum Security cells or "the hole"

During a riot, the guards had to drop grenades to the ground to control the prisoners. Here are the marks in the ground where the gradates hit.

Standing in front of the cells where the famous escape was made. If you look closely you can see the holes in the wall where the vents were supposed to be.

 William G. Baker is one of the last remaining prisoners from Alcatraz. He was there for a book signing- quite frankly, his mugshot on the book gives me the ultimate willies. But he was so sweet! We were afraid to ask what he was incarcerated for, so I guess I'll let you know when I read the book!

 

We went back to Pier 39 where I upgraded from 12 donuts to my very own bucket!

 This was the best $5.00 cup of hot chocolate in the world. Dark Chocolate Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate to be exact. This is also us being awesome and taking a mirror pic to show we were so cold we had to buy sweatshirts.

 Husband-Of-The-Year-Award Goes to... Spencer!

The next morning was our Anniversary!

 

 The Aquarium at The Bay was pretty okay, but I would suggest not going. If you want to see an awesome aquarium, spend your money on going to the one in Salt Lake!

After the Aquarium we went to Golden State Park but I was in a terrible mood so I really don't have any pictures from that. Ha! We walked through the Japanese Tea Garden which Spencer really liked, then hitched a cab to the Golden Gate Bridge, which was freezing and soo foggy.

The fog cleared just in time for us to get a few good pictures, and we headed back to The Bay where it was much warmer.

 

 Baby Boy was soo active this whole trip- Spencer finally felt him kicking on our Anniversary! Baby loved San Francisco too!

We went back to Ghiradelli Square and I probably got another Hot Chocolate.. and we ate dinner at a little diner with ridiculous prices for a mediocre grilled cheese.
We went back to our hotel room and got sucked in watching the TV show, Deal With It! If you guys haven't seen it, I suggest you look it up. Like tonight. We were laughing so hard and stayed up way too late when we had to wake up at 3:30AM to get a cab back to Oakland to catch our flight on time!

This was absolutely my favorite Anniversary so far, and my favorite weekend spent with Spencer. It's been so fun to look back & see how things have changed in the last two years, and it made it extra special celebrating our Anniversary this year with a baby bump.

I would say I left my Heart in San Francisco.. but the fact is, I most certainly brought my two loves home with me!

XOXO


Happy Anniversary!

Happy Anniversary to us!

 

 (It was on the 16th.. So I'm a few days late but we spent the weekend together in

San Francisco!)

 

 

Two years later...

 

 

In the last two years we have...

 

Traveled to Puerto Rico

moved into an apartment

looked for homes twice, only once really seriously

shared birthdays and lots of holidays together

Road tripped to Seattle

Added to our Family when we bought bunny Winston

Fought about who's clothes were on the floor

made up afterwards

Finished at least 8 TV series together

Both started school & supported one another

Both been sick & taken care of one another

Attended concerts (mostly country)

Laughed so hard we cried

Cried so hard we laughed

shared lots of fast food & snow cones

Decided to add to our family with baby Gordon coming in July!

Added another member of the family- our turquoise fish

Traveled to San Francisco

Put an offer in on a home

&
Shared so much love..

 

I'm so happy & oh-so-lucky to have this guy by my side, I wouldn't trade it for anything.

 

XOXO

 

 



To Set The Record Straight.

Marriage is a lovely thing.
It's about being married to the right person & being willing to work things out when things aren't going so smoothly.

Now I've tried to steer clear from the marriage posts for a while now because I don't think everyone needs to read about anyones marriage ups & downs, problems or no-problems, sex life etc..

 

But on the other hand, I really do appreciate someone else's post that is completely honest and open about different marriage issues, ups, downs, etc..

 

I guess I'm writing this post to set the record straight.

I have too many blogs I read that portray a lovely perfect life..

The perfect house, the perfect vacations, the perfect romantic date nights week after week after week, the perfect gifts, the perfect love life.. you get the point.

 

I call total BS on a small portion of these posts.
This is NOT me saying these people are not happy..

Let me explain.

 

I was doing my usual morning routine spending way too much time scanning and reading blog posts, when I came across the most sincere post I've read in a long time.

This girl wrote about how she reads these "perfect life" blog posts & was so discouraged about her own life now. She said she didn't know if she married THE ONE because every one elses husbands were showering them with gifts, cooking them dinner every night and continuously having romantic date nights every week. This girl has kids at home and was also thinking she was worlds worst mom because she wasn't feeding her children organic meals three times a day. Her kids liked pbj's and Cheetos occasionally. Then to add to the list, she's not crafty at all so something MUST be wrong with her. RIGHT??

No. So. So. Wrong! My heart absolutely broke for her.
Then I continued by writing the longest comment in blog comment history.

 

People!
You are not perfect!

 

Now. I am happy with my life & the choices that I've made.

But that does not mean I have a perfect life.

 

If it were up to me, I'd never have to go to the gym, I'd eat donuts, ice cream & brownies for breakfast, lunch & dinner, I would have graduated a LONG time ago, I'd be making the big bucks doing what I love, I'd live in a perfect house with a white picket fence on the perfect street lined with big trees, neighbor kids, tire swings & happy barking dogs. I'd cook gourmet homemade meals every night from scratch that looked like Martha Stewart was visiting.. I'd have kids already that never cried or whined (HA), I'd have unlimited amount of money in my bank account & my closet would be lined with every outfit on Pinterest.

 

haha awesome right??

 

Instead, Spencer & I are both in school, living in an apartment paying waaay too much for rent, being careful with what groceries we buy and eating top ramen for dinner, no kids, bunny sometimes pees on the carpet, we both have cars that are on their last leg of the race, and quite frankly after a year and a half of marriage, we are still trying to figure each other out. But we DO have perfect days. We DO have fun vacations together & we DO spend quality time together playing games, going to concerts and getting snow cones together rather than going out for fancy dress up date nights week after week.

 

Because when it comes down to it, I love trying to make it as a poor newlywed couple.
Of course we fight. Sometimes I'm grumpy for no reason, sometimes we scream, sometimes I swear, slam doors & even leave the house. But at the end of the day, we always want to work things out, apologize & try harder next time.

And that is the most important thing. 

 

Go ahead and judge as you please, I refuse to write a post about a perfect marriage and perfect life because I do not have one. And I really don't believe you do either.

Marriage is tough, living with someone else and adjusting to their habits is tough too. 

But it is so much fun and SO so worth it. Life is about loving what you have and making the best out of your situations. I do love my life. It certainly is not perfect.
But I love it and all it's imperfections because those imperfections help us grow.

 

In a blogging world portraying perfect lives in perfect homes,

Just remember that behind those beautiful home doors there are families with imperfections

And that, is what's so wonderful about being human.

XOXO



Girl Time

Today's post is about something I think is important for a healthy marriage.

Often times I read posts about how important it is to spend quality time with our Husbands.

(WHICH IS TOTALLY TRUE!)

 

But what about spending quality time with friends??

 

I am a FIRM believer that marriage, as well as serious relationships, are not about giving things up, but making compromises.

(Now this rule doesn't go for all things. Obviously we have to/need to give some things up..)

But why should friends be one of them?

It SHOULDN'T!

 

Ladies, do not give up your girl time!

(And husbands do not give up your guy time!!)

I would never ask my husband to give up time with his friends.

I think healthy relationships are all about BALANCE, in all aspects.

 

Spencer and I have learned to balance our lives extremely well.

As most of you know, Spencer and I spent the last year of us dating, and first 4 months of marriage living in different places- hours apart. We spent about a week a month together with his work schedule.

This was clearly not your typical newlywed marriage status.

BUT we made it work. I had loads of time on my hands when Spencer was away for work. Friend time, family time.. you name it.

When Spencer was here our time was spent together, still making an effort once during that week to go on a double date and spend a night with family.

 

Once Spencer moved home permanently we had major adjustments to do.

We were used to spending every waking minute together since we were used to only having a week together. Soon we learned that we needed that balance & healthy time apart!

 

If my girlfriends call me up to do a girl's night I will still check with Spencer's schedule and try to coordinate around that, as he does with my schedule.

I've been in unhealthy relationships where I LITERALLY had NO friends. My life and time was dictated for me. Once those relationships ended and I had my friends back.. I can't explain to you the wave of relief I felt inside.

 

What are your opinions on having your girl time?

Whether it's a quick lunch or a weekend away!

How do you coordinate your friend time with your husbands?

 

I would love your input!